Commencement | The Pingry Record

Class of 2020’s Last Day

Jun 7, 2020 | Commencement

By Emily Shen (IV)

Blasting music in the senior area, taking selfies with their friends, and putting on their college shirts to show off their pride and incredible accomplishments––this was how the seniors imagined their last day to be like. However, given the current circumstances of the COVID-19 pandemic, that day had to be remote, which was, predictably, quite frustrating for the seniors. When asked about her last day, Ola Weber (VI) described it as “disappointing” and said, “Brian Li’s final morning meeting announcement concluded with rolling credits of all the senior student government members’ names. I hadn’t cried at all up until that point, but when ‘Hello, Goodbye’ by the Beatles started playing in the background, I was overwhelmed with so many emotions I couldn’t help but cry. But I guess that reaction says it all, doesn’t it? It shows how much this community has impacted me and shaped me into the person I am today.” Another senior, Alison Lee, commented that although she could not physically spend the last day with her friends, “Pingry did a really good job of keeping the Pingry spirit alive with Zoom calls and balloon deliveries by Pingry staff. It reminded everyone that we are part of a bigger Pingry community, and we will get through this.”

When asked about the favorite part of their last day, many mentioned the first-ever virtual SAC assembly. Weber, as a principal member of the SAC, shared the process of putting together this assembly. “When Dean Ross mentioned putting on the virtual SAC assembly, I thought it was a great idea. I think humor is so important and laughing through these times can really help us cope with this strange reality.” One of her biggest challenges and fears was that it wouldn’t bring comedic relief. “Obviously the technical component is tough because you’re not able to interact with people and in anything you do, but especially in comedy. After you’re finished with a project you crave feedback. You can really pick up on whether people think the stuff you’re putting out is funny or not and my biggest fear was that people would nod their head and smile and tell me ‘yeah this is good stuff’ but not really think it was.”

After the disappointing cancelation of the winter SAC assembly, the club aimed to utilize this new platform to provide the best content possible. When asked about the effects of the cancellation of the winter assembly, Nic Gambello (V), another organizer of the virtual assembly, responded, “It was disappointing, but I think it motivated us to work harder this time around. We knew people were upset in the winter, so we felt that we had a responsibility to make up for it.” Despite the challenges that came their way, the SAC did a great job to alleviate the students’ stress and many students gave feedback saying that it was something that they looked forward to and thoroughly enjoyed.

Given the circumstances, seniors were not able to go back to school and participate in many exciting events, such as an in-person graduation ceremony or their senior dance. Many commented about how much they are going to miss the Pingry community. “I’m going to miss the teachers and I’m just going to miss the familiarity of it all. It’s really a lovely thing when you know a community so well, yet you can still learn so much from it each and every day.” Weber shared her most cherished moments at Pingry, “I always loved, during the spring, the days when it would be humid and then a couple of hours into school there would be a thunderstorm and you’d be in class and you’d crack the windows and you’d listen to the rain and the thunder and the trees––the school had this really distinct smell––and you were just in your little secluded Pingry bubble. I’d say those days I’m going to miss the most.” Similarly, Lee noted that she is going to miss the energy that Pingry has. “I am going to miss conversations with my teachers and high-fives with my friends. We’re not going to have the famous senior day bouncy house,” she remarked, “but I hear next year’s reunion is going to be huge!”

Despite not being able to say goodbyes to the seniors in person, every one of us in the Pingry community is sending our love and wishes to the graduating seniors. Dear Class of 2020, no matter where you go, or what dreams you decide to pursue, please know that, while disappointing, this period of time has brought us closer together as a Pingry community and that we will always be thinking of you. We will miss you, and best of luck!

New Plans For Class of 2020 Graduation

Jun 7, 2020 | Commencement

By Meghan Durkin (V)

Following NJ Governor Phil Murphy’s announcement that school closures would be extended through the end of June, Pingry needed to adjust plans for graduation, which was originally supposed to be held on June 7. While the traditional in-person Commencement is not permissible amid the COVID-19 pandemic on the original date, the Pingry administration is working hard to celebrate the senior class in creative ways.

To replace the typical Commencement, Pingry will release a video for the seniors on what would have been graduation day. Upper School Director Ms. Ananya Chatterji, who helped organize these new graduation plans, hopes the video will honor the seniors’ achievement until an in-person graduation is possible. Ms. Chatterji acknowledges the difficulties of truly celebrating seniors in the way many had hoped: “I keep feeling that no matter what we do, it’s not enough. Nothing replaces in-person hugs or conversations or special moments.”

Despite these challenges, the Pingry community has worked to make the senior’s last months of high school as special as possible considering the circumstances. During May, seniors were sent balloons and their caps and gowns; each member of the senior class was also invited to campus to take photos with their families. On the seniors’ last day before starting their ISPs, Pingry released a video of messages from underclassmen and faculty celebrating the accomplishments and impact of the senior class.

The significance of Commencement isn’t going unnoticed. Ms. Chatterji and the rest of the administration are dedicated to providing them with the experience, even if it is unconventional. “[Commencement] really is the dividing line between childhood and adulthood. We have watched them grow up. We have traveled this road with them. The relationships that the seniors have formed with the faculty, with each other, and with the underclassmen is remarkable, important, and true. We want to mark this transition from childhood to adulthood, but we also want to celebrate with them,” noted Ms. Chatterji.

A traditional graduation is still in the works. Pingry has set aside three alternate dates for an in-person Commencement, either August 2nd, November 25th, or December 20th, depending on the extent of restrictions in New Jersey. The continued effort to offer this year’s seniors the true graduation experience is a testament to the importance of the event within the Pingry community. As Ms. Chatterji states, “Graduation is the biggest school event of the year. It is the pinnacle of all that we stand for and believe in. The faculty, the senior class, and their parents — in one room — to mark the end of one journey and the start of a new one.” She hopes that, in the end, COVID-19 won’t stand in the way of honoring the seniors properly.

Dear Pingry

Jun 7, 2020 | Brynn Weisholtz, Senior Reflections

By Brynn Weisholtz

In this time, we are surrounded by unknowns, unsure of whatever comes next. The media outlets have analyzed this pandemic from every angle, scrutinizing each viewpoint… except, it seems, the positive one. It is with this sentiment I find myself longing to share what I believe to be Pingry’s greatest quality: its deep commitment and dedication to the student body.

As I walked out of the clocktower on March 6th, my backpack filled with books, I was prepared to depart for my final Spring Break at Pingry, ready for the exciting conclusion to my senior year. However, this year, that anticipatory aura was not present. Preparing for COVID-19, teachers and administrators instructed us to bring everything home. When my extended Spring Break turned into a permanent quarantine, I feared this marked the end of high school. Nevertheless, while my time inside the Pingry walls came to a close, the faculty, staff, and administration refused to allow this to be our official end of high school. Even apart, we were able to stay connected as a class and community.

From this point, we went online. Teachers willingly made adjustments to their disrupted personal lives. The Pingry family grew, children and pets being a welcome inclusion into the virtual classroom. They helped us retain a sense of normalcy, even from our bedrooms and kitchen tables. Outside of the classroom, we were still able to participate in quintessential senior events. From the comfort of our homes, the Virtual SAC Assembly was as humorous and witty as ever. Dressed in spirit gear in our living rooms, the athletic awards were a welcome reminder of all we have accomplished over these last four years. The Pingry faculty and staff was instrumental in allowing us to keep these traditions, but that was not all these wonderful individuals did for us.

We, the Class of 2020, will go down in history for the world we are graduating into, but in our minds, we will fondly remember the special gifts and events we got to have, unique to our class. On the morning of May 1st, each senior woke up to balloons on our front steps, commemorating our final day of classes. Later that day, we were welcomed back to the Pingry parking lot, social distancing from our trunks and sunroofs. We received surprise packages, filled with bookstore memorabilia and graduation regalia. The Pingry community ensured that I could still display the Pingry colors proudly.

The teachers gave us lasting memories, bringing the student body and faculty together in unity. Whether the special videos with messages, the college shirt video, or the advisor Spotify playlist, we were able to get a window into the lives of our beloved teachers. No other class had received these special senior gifts, and they are ones my peers and I will continue to cherish.

Then came the senior picture day on campus. My family packed into our car and made the journey west on Route 78, perhaps for my last time as a high school student. We turned the corner past the stone entrance, and were met with familiar faces: ours, smiling back, all together. The car slowed to a crawl down the driveway as I scanned the images of my friends and peers. This was quite the surprise, and such a special one at that. The Pingry community had given us this treasured gift, one even my brother, Class of 2016, laments he did not receive. Although we missed out on the last few months in Basking Ridge, we received innumerable and immeasurable gifts, specially curated for our class, that we will take with us forever, uniquely ours.

There is a theme throughout these activities: connection and community. While we certainly did not envision ending our Pingry career this way, we, the collective Pingry community, have not allowed quarantine to rob us of our traditions. From the award ceremonies over Zoom to the senior photos on campus, we maintain a positive and unified group. The Class of 2020 will certainly be remembered, and the teachers and administration are sending us off with unprecedented fanfare that will propel us into our future colleges with courage and resilience. Things may be more different now that ever, but we are still going out strong. Thank you Pingry and congratulations to the Class of 2020 once more.

Belonging

Jun 7, 2020 | Senior Reflections

By Emily Sanchez

I have a vivid memory of sitting in the senior area as a newly accepted eighth grader and listening to a panel of students talk about Pingry. It was the first time I had ever actually visited Pingry, and knowing absolutely no one, I was nervous out of my mind. I remember a parent asking a question along the lines of, “What are easy ways to make friends at Pingry?” My interest piqued as I started to take mental notes of everything that the students said. One student’s response stuck with me throughout high school. He couldn’t think of any additional thoughts that were not already mentioned by his peers, so all he said was: “I don’t really know exactly how I made my friends. All I know is that one day I looked around and realized that I finally belonged.”

As freshman year rolled around, I kept reminding myself that I just had to wait out the awkward part. Everything would eventually come together before my eyes, and I’d just belong. Although admittedly a little bit slower than most, I joined clubs, played sports, and found my friends. However, the moment promised to me by the student on the panel did not come until my senior year.

I’m sure the rest of my grade would agree when I say that we always felt like a lesser grade than those before us. The grade directly above us was considered one of the smartest to ever go through Pingry, and we were the grade that had a Juul scandal and two kids who were expelled. While other grades generally got along with each other, our grade was very cliquey. This all changed senior year.

For some reason, our grade really flourished this past year. We consistently went to sports games and theater performances, the cliques faded to simply groups of friends, and we helped each other through the college process with hardly any sense of competition.

Cut to February and there had been a string of suicides at various surrounding schools, some of which deeply affected members of our class. A lot of us felt like the school wasn’t doing enough to address it, so the peer leaders decided to organize a form meeting in which a handful of students sat on the edge of the stage in Macrae and shared their stories regarding mental health. Usually, there is a slight hum during form meetings due to the large number of people in a relatively small space. But this time, every single person in the theater was absolutely silent. The vulnerability from the seniors that spoke and the respect from the rest of the class created an atmosphere in the room that everybody involved will never forget. There was an unspoken sense that we were all struggling in our own ways, but that everyone in our grade was there to help us get through it.

After the seniors who shared their stories were finished, we did something that the peer leaders call “shout-outs,” which is exactly what it sounds like. People started standing up, without any prompt and thanked somebody else in our grade for something small that they had done in the past. Seniors from every friend group in our grade ended up shouting out their friends, or sometimes people they barely knew.

In the middle of the shout-outs, the student from the panel popped into my head. I found myself looking around the room and thinking that I could, with one hundred percent confidence, say that I felt like I belonged in the Class of 2020. That feeling has not left since.

The Legacy of the Class of 2020

Jun 7, 2020 | Senior Reflections

By Burke Pagano

When I look back on this past year, one memory of our grade comes to mind before any others. The grade began to funnel into Macrae Theater at 10 o’clock for a routine form meeting. A few seniors had the idea that we should get together as a grade to talk about mental health; it was a pertinent topic. It was a stressful time for everyone. The semester was ending, anxiousness about college was growing, but more importantly, there was a tragic, unexpected stress that loomed over the community. Over the past month, there were a series of suicides among seniors in the northern New Jersey area. Many in the class knew or knew of these students and felt we needed to address this as a whole senior community at Pingry.

The leaders of the meeting were brave. They opened up about personal experiences with mental health and emphasized the importance of supporting one another. Their message was clear: we have an obligation as seniors and members of a community to look out for each other and lift each other up. The student leaders challenged us to move outside our friend groups and show that we appreciate those that might not even know it. To put this in action, they asked anyone who was willing to stand up and give a shoutout to someone who had a positive influence in others’ lives. For the next ten minutes, dozens of students shared what other people in the class meant to them. It was the epitome of a community supporting each other. It was a genuine experience, and the grade carried a new energy from that point on.

This moment together in Macrae showed the growth we had as a class. During our freshman year, the only reason we would have had a form meeting in Macrae was to be lectured after making a mess in the freshman area. Now, we entered Macrae in support of our fellow classmates in a forum, where we sought to improve the culture of our school. We could have ignored this challenging subject and continued with our lives, but we addressed it head on. This is the character of the Class of 2020. We started high school with teachers and administrators asking, “What are we going to do with this grade?” and by the end had them asking, “What are we going to do without them?”

We did not get the ending to high school we were hoping for; that is obvious. But the Class of 2020 is undoubtedly leaving a legacy at Pingry. Throughout our four years of high school, and even just six months as seniors, the ability of this class to come together when times are tough and shape better versions of ourselves and our communities is truly remarkable. They have made a positive impact on the culture at Pingry and will surely continue to do so in college and in life. Congratulations to the Class of 2020.

Student Body President Li Reflects on Time at Pingry

Jun 7, 2020 | Senior Reflections

By Brian Li

I did not want to come to Pingry. When I first received the phone call from the Admissions Office as an eighth-grader, I was ambivalent. The thought of being a new student in a new school in a new town was an incredibly daunting one. I remember the first night in a new home, the surprise of seeing bookbags strewn across the floor, and the angst of finding a seat in the lunchroom. My freshman advisor Ms. Lily Wang noted bluntly to my family that I had a penchant for isolating myself in the library during my free time, where I could slide into a cubicle and go unnoticed.

For the longest time, I struggled to identify with Pingry, and there were many nights when I questioned if the Admissions Office had erred. A friend once commented that I am an introvert who acts like an extrovert, and so it was extremely uncomfortable to feel like I could only see the community through a window. “People at my old school aren’t like this,” I would quietly think to myself. Although I am loath to admit it, there was a bitterness within me that bordered on animus.

Without realizing it, I had squandered my first weeks at Pingry making three foolish mistakes: first, I had a deep-seated impatience within me which desired for everything to happen instantly; second, I thought that I could become a part of the community without effort; and third, I was blind to the deep-seated humanity present in Pingry at large, as well as in the Class of 2020 in particular.

Pingry is a fast-paced community, but amidst our impulse to reach our goals, we often forget to appreciate that which can be gleaned from the journey. Like I said at Convocation, failures and setbacks are not frightening—they are fertile experiences for positive personal growth and transformation. My advisor Mr. Drew Burns’ exhortations to “slow down” and “run your own race” has become a calming mantra that has accompanied me during the stresses of junior and senior year, and I wish that I had known that as a freshman. It takes courage to see beyond the diktat of unchecked and half-baked ambitions that run on unreasonable schedules, and I lacked that as a freshman.

Despite my impatience, by Thanksgiving, I had found my people. I still vividly remember those people who welcomed me into the Pingry community as soon as I began to branch out: my freshman Art Funds class with Mr. Peter Delman, English 9 with Dr. Reid Cottingham, World History 9 with Dr. Ryan Staude (where I dropped an f-bomb after a very bad review Jeopardy bet), and the Quiz Bowl team.

Becoming a part of any community takes a bit of effort and a leap of faith. I have a calligraphy scroll hanging over my desk which reads “盡人事順天意”—do what you must and then follow the will of heaven. Everything happens in due course, and with a little bit of patience, I was able to find a community which was teeming with humanity, spirit, and compassion. I have been so privileged to serve our community as a member of Student Government and to have come to personally know so many other amazing people through the other hats I wore over the past four. I am ever grateful to my peers and teachers for accepting me with my eccentricities, clumsiness, and flaws, and for motivating me to work hard to better myself.

The Pingry Record has asked me to think and reflect on the defining moments of my time as a part of Pingry and the Class of 2020. I find it difficult to do so, as the friendships and bonds we share are a constant presence in our lives, even when we are apart. Pingry and the Class of 2020 have created a dynamic and resilient community which has celebrated each other’s successes, comforted each other during setbacks, and bravely weathered both the Pingry Plague and COVID-19.

This is a community which has squashed my naïve skepticism with its warmth. This is a community which seeks out the most meaningful and unique parts of each person who has passed through its doors. And, over the past four years, there have been all too many moments when the members of this community have looked at each other with a mix of disbelief and pride at the ways we have enriched each other’s lives, created lasting memories, and grown in ways we could have never imagined.